Published April 4, 2009 by Dorothy

“What do you want to play the harp and the fiddle for ?” my Mam asked when I mentionned the music lessons to her.”That’ll cost you money.”

“I’ve always wanted to play the harp remember ?” I said.”Since I was little.”

“Yeah well. You wanted to be a fairy princess too.You can’t always do what you want.”

“Well maybe I can’t be a princess”(Well you never know, Harry is still single isn’t he ? I thought.But I didn’t say that aloud.) “Buuut I can buy harp and book lessons so why not ?”

“You’ve go 2000 quids for the harp, have you now?”

Well not exactly, but I’m more thinking of hiring one. It’s fairly common practice, to hire instruments that are that expansive, when you start playing.

“For all your needs, there’s mastercard” I quote very seriously to mam. My banker actually tried to talk me into getting myself a new credit card with like,3000 quids overdraft, and I think that is because I accidentally led him to believe I was a zillionaire. Either that or he was on magic mushrooms when I talked to him.

When I was back home a couple of days and went to the bank for some reason I don’t remember, he asked me if I had an account with another bank because he hadn’t heard about me in a long time, so I said yes, because I was in Australia for a little while  so I had a account with a bank there.And then I said I was in New Caledonia after that, and now in Ireland. He then asked what job I had been doing s I said,oh, you know, not much.Not much meaning unimportant jobs like waitressing and checkout chick and all,just to pay my way around. But I then realised he was starting to think that I meant I was jet setting around the world doing nothing.He started to tell me I should open a new account better suited to my needs, on which I could deposit up to 10 grands (Fat chance of me depositing 10 grands ). He then got all friendly and started telling anecdotes about his dog and his wife and the back seat of his car being too small. Without thinking I said “oh, it’s the same at the back of the Maserati”. (As I was saying in my previous posts, I’m au pair and the family owns a Maserati).

At the word “Maserati” his head jerked up.I was going to inform him it wasn’t my Maserati but then he started talking about me getting a Platinum card and so I kept my mouth shut because some things are better left unsaid isn’t that right ?

But what was I talking about? Oh, yeah, mam and the harp. Mam thinks it’s a bad idea but I so dreamed to play an instrument ever since I was a kid and I never got the opportunity.

I’m the kind of person that acts on impulses. When I want to do something, well, I do it, whatever anyone says. You have to. Your life is short, and you have only one go at it. It is yours, and not your parents’, or your mates’, or anyone elses so you should be the one shaping it, and you shouldn’t let what people think influence your choices too much.Whether it’s going to Nepal, dyeing your hair red,learn figure skating,you should go for it, I think.

I look back at my journey through life and think  “that was awesome” sometimes I think “Whatever was I thinking that day?” and sometimes “What a fiasco” and sometimes “that was great fun.”

What you don’t want is to look back and stare at an empty canvas where it all should have been.You don’t want to look back at wishes that got lost along the way,dreams drowned in being realistic and being reasonable, opportunities that drifted out of reach.You don’t want to see empty albums and wasted time and think “what a shame” and think “too late”.




M xx


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